Although many will deny it, virtually everyone has a kink or a fetish of some sort. You might like to have your hair pulled during your encounters, or you might even find yourself weirdly obsessed with your partner’s feet. Whether you’d personally label these things as “kinks” or “fetishes” doesn’t matter – you likely have a few slightly odd things you regularly enjoy.
But have you ever wondered what others enjoy? What are some of the most fascinating kinks you might come across? Take a look to find out.
Do You Have a Kink or a Fetish?
Before we get into the full list of kinks and fetishes you might find interesting, it’s good to go over these two commonly (and wrongly) interchangeable concepts. What’s a kink, and how is it different from a fetish?
Put plainly – the difference lies in how much you need it to become sexually aroused.
A kink is a simple preference that’s somewhat outside of what society labels as “normal.” It’s something you like to do alone or with a partner that increases your libido. You don’t need it to experience pleasure, but it’s always a plus.
Whether a sexual act is a kink or not depends mainly on your social circle. Your vanilla Christian neighbor might find anything outside the missionary position in a dark room with a spouse kinky. On the other hand, your drinking buddy with four hookup apps on their phone might have a much looser definition of kink.
Now, a fetish is a slightly different concept. Just like a kink, it’s not considered a “normal” sexual activity by the wider society, but unlike a kink, it’s necessary for experiencing pleasure. It needs to be present for you to feel aroused, but depending on your fetish, it could be enough for you to simply fantasize about it during sex.
Exciting Kinks and Fetishes You Might Want to Try
Now, lock your doors, set your pearls aside to avoid clutching them, and put your kink-shaming days behind you. It’s time to check out the full list of kinks and fetishes that you might just want to give a try.
1. Roleplay
Who hasn’t tried the old boss and assistant roleplay in bed? Maybe teacher and student? Doctor and patient? It’s the most popular kink of them all, and perhaps even the most versatile, as it allows you to be anything you want to be. You can pretend to be of a different profession, different age, or even different species.
It can be a great thing to try if you tend to be shy in bed. It gives you a chance to let go of your inhibitions and experiment with something new without feeling embarrassed.
2. Consensual Nonconsent
Consensual nonconsent is a type of roleplay where everyone involved provides a clear consent beforehand to the activities that may appear non-consensual during the act. Rape play, for example, is a common type of this fetish – the “victim” agrees to the whole scenario beforehand but pretends to resist any sexual activity when you start playing.
It cannot be stressed enough how critical it is to receive abundantly clear consent before this act. Otherwise, it could be exceptionally dangerous and traumatic for everyone involved. It’s a good idea to establish a safe word and set strict boundaries before you start playing around with consensual nonconsent.
3. The Sleeping Beauty Syndrome
The sleeping beauty syndrome is a relatively rare fetish when someone is turned on by the idea of having sex while they’re asleep (or nearly asleep). The opposite of this would be somnophilia, where you get aroused at the thought of having sex with someone who is asleep.
Like with consensual nonconsent, it’s critical to talk about this kink or fetish with your partner beforehand and get consent in advance. If you don’t, a quirky innocent fantasy can quickly turn into sexual harassment.
4. Clothing Fetishism
Clothing fetishism comes in all shapes and sizes. It can be a part of roleplay where you dress in clothing suitable to your chosen roles. It could simply be a fetish for having sex while clothed or a fetish for a uniform.
Some of the most popular clothing fetishes are centered on specific materials – leather, spandex, latex, and lace. Many men will have a lingerie fetish where they get turned on by their partner wearing sexy lingerie during the act. Some will have a fetish for unique costumes and full-body suits. Whatever the case is, don’t judge it until you try it.
5. Hosiery
Hosiery is a subtype of clothing fetishism, focused specifically on nylon pantyhose. You could be turned on by either you or your partner wearing hosiery while you mess around. Pro tip: if you want to give this a try, go for crotchless or thigh-high pantyhose – it makes everything much easier and much more accessible.
Many foot fetishists also have a hosiery fetish or even altocalciphilia – a strong fetish for someone wearing high heels.
6. BDSM
We can’t talk about kinks and fetishes without mentioning BDSM (Bondage, Discipline, Sadism, Masochism). It has a million different shades, suitable for all tastes and preferences.
Light BDSM could involve tickling, gentle spanking, and even light humiliation. In more extreme cases, the partners like to engage in knife or needle play and even 24/7 arrangements where the dominant partner controls every aspect of the submissive one’s behavior.
7. Temperature Play
Temperature play could be a form of BDSM, but not necessarily. As its name would suggest, it involves playing around with different temperatures – gliding an ice cube down your partner’s body or dripping hot candle wax on their stomach. It could be a kink for having sex in the snow or even putting sex toys in the freezer before you start using them.
More extreme enthusiasts of temperature play like using fire to make things more exciting in the bedroom. Of course, it goes without saying that this can be a dangerous practice, so tread carefully.
8. Sensory Deprivation
Sensory deprivation is the practice of preventing your partner (or yourself) from using all five of your senses. Blindfolds are the most popular option, but you could also use noise-canceling earmuffs to prevent your partner from hearing you or even gloves to prevent them from feeling your touch.
Sensory deprivation can be exciting as it allows you to focus on the more important sensations while enjoying your time with your partner.
9. Erotic Asphyxiation/Breathplay
Erotic asphyxiation and breathplay are common subcategories of BDSM and could be extremely dangerous! It involves preventing yourself or your partner from breathing properly through choking.
Although slight choking can be incredibly exciting, making you feel lightheaded and excited, you must be as gentle as possible. Never put pressure on the front of the neck (the windpipe) as it can easily lead to injury. Put pressure on the sides or alternatively put your hand over your partner’s mouth (still allowing them to breathe through their nose).
10. Exhibitionism
Exhibitionism is a relatively popular kink often related to agoraphilia – an interest in having sex in public places. It involves performing sexual acts in front of others.
If you want to play around with it, you could try masturbating in front of your partner or going to a sex party.
Of course, you could also try having sex in secluded but public places. Keep in mind that exposing yourself to strangers is illegal, so you’ll want to find a safe space where you can enjoy your partner without actually being caught by random strangers.
11. Voyeurism
The opposite of exhibitionism is voyeurism – aka watching others while they’re having sex. It’s highly illegal if you don’t have consent from the people you’re watching, but you can still safely enjoy it at sex parties or during threesomes. You could even combine exhibitionism and voyeurism by watching consenting individuals having sex and masturbating.
12. Edging
Edging is an exciting kink that involves bringing your partner to the brink of orgasm without letting them finish immediately. It can be exceptionally fun, prolonging the act and making it all the more interesting for everyone involved.
A more extreme version of edging is known as orgasm control and falls under the category of BDSM. The dominant partner has full control over when the submissive one can finish and often prevents them from doing so altogether.
13. Electrophilia
Electrophilia is a kink for playing around with electricity during sexual encounters. It could be anything from a bit of static shock that turns you on to electric shocks that verge on the painful.
In BDSM circles, many submissive partners enjoy wearing electric dog collars during sex.
It’s important to note that while minor electrical stimulation could be pleasurable, it’s never a good idea to play with actual high-voltage electricity.
14. Cuckolding
Cuckolding can be a part of BDSM as it involves erotic humiliation. It’s about watching your partner cheat on you with another person. Typically, the dominant partner will have sex with another while the submissive one watches. In some cases, the dominant one will even verbally humiliate the submissive one during the act.
15. Quirofilia
If you love having your partner give you handjobs, you might just have quirofilia – a kink or fetish for hands. Their physical appearance might turn you on, or you might even have an obsession with fingers and fingernails. Some individuals are even turned on by the sexual acts that hands can perform, while others simply like watching hands perform mundane tasks like typing on the keyboard or folding laundry.
16. Fat Fetishism
Fat fetishism is pretty self-explanatory. It’s a fetish for having sex with overweight individuals. Some can take it a bit further and experience sexual arousal from feeding their partner or even watching them put on more and more weight over time.
Like most kinks and fetishes, it can belong to the BDSM category, where the dominant partner controls how much weight the submissive one gains.
17. Polyiterophilia
Polyiterophilia is a less fancy way of saying group sex, and virtually everyone has at least fantasized about it. After all, threesomes are the most common sexual fantasy, at least among men.
It’s a common kink among those who are interested in exhibitionism.
18. Katoptronophilia
If your perfect bedroom interior design includes a mirror installed above your bed, you might just have katoptronophilia, aka a kink for mirrors. You might like watching yourself masturbating or get off from seeing yourself in the middle of the act with a partner. You might just enjoy watching your partner from every angle imaginable.
Many individuals with a kink for mirrors are also turned on by recording themselves while having sex with their partner.
19. Objectum Sexuality/Objectophilia
Objectum sexuality or objectophilia is a sexual desire for objects – vibrators, anal beads, and other sex toys are the most common objects of desire. The fetish could also extend to sex dolls, statues, and mannequins. However, some individuals can get turned on by any random inanimate object, including cars, shoes, computers, or even the Eiffel Tower.
20. Wet and Messy Fetishism
Often abbreviated to WAM, the wet and messy fetish involves getting turned on by different messy substances that you can apply to yourself. It can be anything from sticky food like chocolate syrup to body lotions, slime, and even mud. The wetter and messier the better.
Somewhat similar to WAM is hygrophilia – a fetish for bodily fluids like sperm, vaginal secretions, saliva, and the like.
Final thoughts
There’s no shortage of kinks and fetishes you can come across and play around with. You can turn virtually anything into a kink if it gives you sexual pleasure. While there’s rarely anything wrong with exploring your own kinks and fetishes, always remember to get prior consent from all your partners if you want everyone involved to have a good time.